In large mixing bowl, pour the milk over the bread and allow to sit for ten minutes. Mash with a fork into a smooth paste. Using your hands, mix in the meat along with 1/2 teaspoon of salt and 1/2 teaspoon of pepper.
In a large Dutch oven or heavy-bottomed pot, heat the bacon grease over medium heat. Add the onion, chili powder, oregano, cumin, red pepper flakes, and cayenne until the onions have softened, about 4 minutes. Add the garlic and cook 4 minutes more, until the garlic is softened and lightly browned.
Add the meat mixture to the Dutch oven, 1 pound at a time, breaking up with a spatula. Cook until the meat is browned. Pour in half a can of the crushed tomatoes and scrape the pan to get any browned bits.
Add the remaining crushed tomatoes, beans, soy sauce, sugar, canned chiles, and beer. Bring to a boil then reduce to a simmer and simmer for 1 hour on low heat. Remove the lid and simmer for 15 minutes, or until it has thickened a little.
Check for seasonings and add salt if desired. Serve in bowls with sour cream, cheese, and crushed tortilla chips.